Arkharova Ekaterina, student of 11 "a" class MBOU secondary school No. 24, Volzhsky

Loneliness has no face. This feeling is familiar to children, and young and wise age. Loneliness often scares us. But is it worth it to be afraid? Why is it given to us? We tried to find answers to these questions in this project work.

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Social project "Loneliness" Worked on the project: Ekaterina Arkharova, student of 11 "a" class. Project leader, pedagogue-psychologist Yaner O.I.

Loneliness is the eternal refrain of life. It is no worse or better than anything else. There is just too much talk about him. Man is alone always and never. Erich Maria Remarque

Loneliness is a common phenomenon in large cities, where communication with various people occurs briefly and superficially, and there is not enough time to establish long-term and trusting relationships. Loneliness can be experienced by a young man or girl who cannot find a suitable partner, or old man who has lost friends and relatives and is unable to find mutual language with the younger generation. Loneliness is often experienced by people with an inert nervous system, with difficulty making new contacts, slowly getting used to new acquaintances. In extreme cases, loneliness can lead to depression. Loneliness is a mystery that worries people from century to century. Understanding our feelings and emotions, we know ourselves. Loneliness is a part of us, in which we are all, each in our own way .... Project relevance

Understand the meaning of loneliness and find the strengths and weaknesses of this state

Teenagers. Target group

Problematic question Loneliness is a punishment or a resource

Work plan 1. got acquainted with the concept of "loneliness" 2. identified the causes of loneliness 3. analyzed childhood memories 4. identified the strengths and weaknesses of this condition 5. conclusion 6. recommendations

Loneliness is a socio-psychological phenomenon, the emotional state of a person associated with the lack of close, positive emotional ties with people and / or with the fear of losing them as a result of forced or psychologically caused social isolation. Within the framework of this concept, two different phenomena are distinguished - positive (loneliness) and negative (isolation) loneliness.

Causes of loneliness Low self-esteem, which leads to avoidance of contact with other people for fear of being criticized; Weak communication skills; Fear of failing in a relationship or falling into a psychological addiction; An ever-growing sense of misunderstanding and lack of demand from others; Sensory deprivation in one form or another (in other words, the lack of one or another type of information or impressions); The transition from one society to another: in other words, "change of the social matrix".

Introspection Loneliness for me is a special inner world that has boundaries, since this world exists only for one person. But on the other hand, loneliness is a universe, which I study, you get to know yourself more and more deeply.

Situation Consequence In childhood, often left alone, the only connection with the world was through TV Low social activity, reduced need to communicate with peers, favorite game is to draw and fantasize Parents' divorce elementary school is almost erased The change of society has led to disorientation Strict educational framework, parental control, limited communication with peers Low social activity, reduced need for communication with peers, a sense of insecurity spent school at home Lack of emotional warmth, inner uncertainty. Interests in drawing and development of imagination Quarrels, conflict situations with mother and classmates Outbursts of anger, desire to express oneself, intolerance to a different position.

Withdrawal Low social activity Short temper Self-doubt Low self-esteem Weak sides loneliness

Strengths of loneliness Self-reliance Independence (from others) Self-knowledge Good imagination

Conclusion The work on this project allowed to expand knowledge about loneliness. I looked at the situation from two sides: what loneliness gives me and what it deprives me of. I realized that loneliness was a kind of test for me, a lesson in life. I began to realize that communication with people is an important part of life. It is important to be in harmony not only with yourself, but also with the world around you.

Recommendations Do not be afraid of loneliness. The fear of being alone sometimes pushes us to communicate with people, which is not always good for us. Loneliness is unique opportunity get acquainted with interesting person- With myself. Loneliness is not a given reality, it is just your attitude to the world. Change it and take a step towards people. Loneliness is a sign calling for change. This is the time to make choices and decisions. This is the boundary between the familiar present and the new future.

Thank you for your attention!

Loneliness can inspire writing poetry, music, and paintings. But, although the material can be good, research shows that loneliness is extremely detrimental to health. Science has linked this psychological state to high blood pressure, metabolic failure, the risk of developing heart disease and diabetes. Not to mention how loneliness leads to depression.

Also, studies by the American Association of Retirees showed that 35% of those over 45 were single.

Below are 10 strategies for dealing with this sad condition.

1. Understand what loneliness is

"There's a difference between solitude and loneliness," says Sanam Hafiz, a licensed clinical psychologist in New York and a college professor at Columbia University. "Both terms essentially mean that a person is alone; however, they are talking about different ways of thinking," she continues. It is very typical to think that in order to feel good and worthy, you need external confirmation of this and other people around. Solitude is rooted in choice and the world. And when someone enjoys solitude, he / she begins to value connection above all with themselves. They may enjoy spending time with someone else, but they don't need to."

2. Start small

When you feel isolated, it can be difficult to rebuild social bonds. You need to solve this problem gradually, in small steps.

Understand that you are not alone in the literal sense of the word - go to a large supermarket, take a walk in the park, sign up for courses, let other people surround you. It is important to keep moving forward and take steps of social interaction in any form.

3. Get to know people in person

Social media increases the feeling of loneliness when all interaction with people is reduced to viewing their profiles and photos on Instagram. While services like VKontakte and Odnoklassniki offer real connections, they also overemphasize the success of others.

Quit apps, put away your smartphone and laptop, and spend time with people you know. real life. There is no alternative to personal interaction, there are only auxiliary means.

4. Smile and say nice things

A smile and a compliment given to everyone you meet during the day lifts the spirits of you and those around you. In addition, it initiates and strengthens ties.

Simple rules of interaction: smile, compliment and ask something. The fourth step could be an invitation somewhere.

5. Walk More Often

Walking is not just a journey from point A to point B. Walk: notice the world around you, stop to look at beautiful things or listen to street music. Say "hello" to the person you like, wish Have a good day- and you will be surprised how many positive connections will be made if you use this method.

6. Talk to strangers

It sounds awkward, and Bulgakov advised against it, but by starting to greet people in the elevator, you get to know your neighbors, and a little conversation with the seller in the store near your house provides a way out of the routine and comfort zone.

Writer Keo Stark argues that even brief interactions with strangers increase our sense of well-being.

7. Call

Phone calls and video chats give you the feeling of being with people who are currently away from you. Schedule calls the way you would schedule a meeting: chat with a friend for half an hour, an hour; do it regularly, strengthening your connections and making them meaningful.

8. Sign up for courses

Find like-minded people through specialized events. Are you fond of foreign languages? Ever wanted to learn how to cook like a chef? Do it.

9. Reach out to someone who is also lonely

In our loneliness, we may not notice that someone next to us is lonely too. Invite someone who seems socially isolated to you for a walk or coffee.

This is not always an easy task, but by helping your "companion" in this trouble, you will help yourself.

10. Seek professional help if you need it

Go to a psychological consultation, discuss your problem with a psychotherapist, dial the helpline number. Our souls need healing just as a broken leg would. Do this if you feel like you can't handle it on your own.

Loneliness for most people is one of the most. Even the most strong-willed people who claim to be used to and love being alone experience their loneliness keenly, just like the rest. And stress is such a borderline state of mind and body, in which a person is more vulnerable than ever to viruses, bacteria, infections that bombard him from the outside world. A person who is in a state of loneliness has significantly reduced immunity, compared with people who are found in society.

Scientists from the Institute of Behavioral Medicine (USA, Ohio) conducted research in a group of middle-aged people who have problems with being overweight, and who also suffered in the past. On their basis, conclusions were drawn that loneliness, like stress, actively contributed to the deterioration of health in the studied group of people.

To conduct the experiment, scientists used the so-called "loneliness scale", previously developed by other scientists from the University of California (Los Angeles). This scale allows you to assess people's perception of their voluntary or forced loneliness.

According to the results of studies, it was found that lonely people have much higher levels of protein in the blood than others. And this, as you know, is a sure sign of inflammatory processes occurring in the body. It also contributes to the development cardiovascular diseases, Alzheimer's disease, and type II diabetes. The scientists who conducted the research are convinced that the lack of communication is connected with a number of very serious ailments, as well. One of the discoveries was a significant content in the blood of single antibodies to the herpes virus, which usually indicates the activation of this disease. In people who are socially active, as well as married, such antibodies are much less common. Scientifically proven is the fact that herpes often worsens in a person during a period of stress, and most people perceive loneliness as chronic stress.

Tests were also carried out to determine the level of antibodies to cytomegalovirus and Epstein-Bohr virus (also a type of herpes). In social loners, it turned out to be much higher. Socially isolated individuals are prone to more severe inflammation, which undermines the immune system, respectively, and they get sick more often and for longer than socially adapted people.

Even the urine of the test subjects was examined. It turned out to be elevated, compared with those who do not suffer from loneliness, the level of adrenaline. And excessive production of adrenaline lowers the body's resistance to various kinds of infections, especially with age, the body becomes less and less able to resist diseases, gets sick more often, feels "squeezed out". No wonder the adrenaline produced by the adrenal glands is also called the "stress hormone".

Another aspect that emphasizes the difference between lonely and not lonely people at the level of physiology is sleep. Human nature has established it so that sleep is a natural unconscious state during which the human body rests not only from external influences, but also from the person himself (no matter how ridiculous it sounds). But everything is true, because bad thoughts, vain hopes, fears and worries, resentment - all the negativity that has accumulated during the day lets a person go. The brain at this time does other work that helps a person to relax, not to think, not to be tormented, breathing evens out, the work of the nervous system is normalized, the organs rest. In the morning, a person wakes up fresh, cheerful, rested and already with a different approach to the problem that has been tormenting since the evening, as if a hundred years of loneliness have passed.

In lonely people, especially in those isolated for a long time, they are almost always observed. These are insomnia, and superficial sleep that does not bring benefits, and frequent awakenings, the inability to fall asleep at night and, as a result, sleep only during the daytime. Gradually nervous system such people are shaken, they become no longer able to enjoy life, sensitive, touchy, irritable, intolerant. And it doesn't prolong life. What can be said in the end? As Slava sings, loneliness is a bastard!

What is loneliness? This concept can be interpreted in different ways. It is wrong to think that the person who lives alone is considered lonely. Loneliness is, rather, a special way of realizing one's own "I", when a person feels unnecessary, abandoned, forgotten. We will talk about the problem of loneliness in our article.

Loneliness, first of all, is a feeling that is born in the soul. Sometimes, it occurs even when a person is surrounded on all sides by friends, colleagues, relatives. It is quite difficult to understand where this chilling coldness of emptiness comes from. But it is especially common among teenagers and the elderly. Loneliness is a rather complex feeling of denial, and in order to overcome it, you need to make a lot of effort.

The problem of loneliness in the elderly

Elderly people especially often feel lonely. And this is not surprising. They are among the people who need the help and support of others. But, unfortunately, the problem of loneliness in old age is gaining momentum. recent years more and more turnovers. At the same time, not only living without relatives or the absence of them leads to loneliness, but also misunderstanding or rejection on the part of relatives and the family in which an elderly person lives.

Feeling lonely in old age can be for various reasons. Children move away, old acquaintances and friends die, communication with society comes to naught, various stressful situations occur in life. Of course, over time, an elderly person will be able to overcome the feeling of his own uselessness, but one cannot do without the support of relatives and friends.

Loneliness as a social problem

Studying loneliness as a social concept, first of all, special groups of society are taken into account, and not society as a whole. Acute forms of social loneliness are manifested in such concepts as ostracism, exile. A person who feels that he has lost connections with the team and the people around him can feel lonely. So, often the usual dismissal from work is the cause of a feeling of loneliness, which develops into depression and has an extremely negative effect on a person’s condition. So loneliness is like social problem, manifests itself most often when a person is excluded from a team, not hired, fired, outvoted, and also when a person is deliberately avoided for various reasons, for example, because of skin color.

Loneliness as a psychological problem

If we summarize the provisions of some theories of psychoanalysts, we can say that loneliness from the point of view of psychology is a condition that is rooted in childhood. One of the psychoanalysts, Zilburg, believed that there was a big difference between loneliness and solitude. The first phenomenon is a constant sensation that can harm a person. The second is a normal and transient state, to one degree or another characteristic of each of us.

G. Sullivan spoke about the etiology of loneliness as a need for human closeness, which manifests itself from infancy. If such a need is not satisfied, a person may develop deep loneliness.

Teenage loneliness

The problem of teenage loneliness is faced by 10 to 50% of people in adolescence. In most cases, this problem is temporary, and along with the termination transitional age she fades away.

Feelings of loneliness in teenagers can arise for various reasons. For example, due to self-doubt, unsuccessful relationships with peers, passivity in social projects, mistakes in the course of training, complexes. To avoid loneliness in adolescence, it is necessary to think positively, express yourself, communicate with others. Well, parents should pay close attention to their children and encourage them in every possible way, showing their love and desire to help, listen, and advise.

federal education agency

ROUVPO<Воронежский институт инновационных систем>

Department of General Socio-Economic and Humanitarian Disciplines.

Abstract on the topic:

Loneliness as a social problem.

Performed

1st year student

UK1-1 group

Zabrovskaya Oksana

Checked

Ishimskaya E.V.

Voronezh 2009

Introduction………………………………………………………………..p.3

Single mothers………………………………………………………page 5

Loneliness of the elderly……………………………………..….page 10

Feeling of loneliness in adolescence….………………….page 13

Conclusion……………………………………………………………..page 17

List of used literature…………………………………….page 19

Introduction

Loneliness is a socio-psychological state characterized by narrowness or lack of social contacts, behavioral alienation and emotional non-involvement of the individual; also a social disease, which consists in the mass presence of individuals experiencing such conditions.

Loneliness with scientific point vision is one of the least developed social concepts. In the demographic literature, there are statistical data on the absolute number and specific gravity lonely people. So, in a number of developed countries of the world (Holland, Belgium, etc.), single people make up about 30% of the population. In the USA, according to 1986 data, there were 21.2 million single people. Compared with 1960, this figure has tripled. By 2000, according to forecasts, another 7.4 million people will “join” them.

In selective studies, the following types were identified among the lonely. The first type is “hopelessly lonely”, completely dissatisfied with their relationship. These people did not have a sexual partner or spouse. They rarely connected with anyone (for example, with neighbors). They have a strong sense of dissatisfaction with their relationships with peers, emptiness, abandonment. More than others, they tend to blame other people for their loneliness.

The second type is "periodically and temporarily lonely." They are sufficiently connected with their friends, acquaintances, although they lack close affection or are not married. They are more likely than others to enter into social contacts in various places. Compared to other singles, they are the most socially active. These people consider their loneliness to be transient, they feel abandoned much less often than other lonely people.

The third type is “passive and persistently lonely”. These are people who have come to terms with their situation, accepting it as inevitable.

At present, interest in the problem of alienation and loneliness seems quite natural. This is due to the nature of today's social situation, which is characterized by uncertainty and instability. Intensive changes in the political, economic, cultural spheres of society's life actively influence the structure of interpersonal relations and human self-awareness. The transitional period (from the traditionally Russian collectivist culture to an individualistic ideology) leads to the transformation of psycho-socio-cultural structures that determine business and interpersonal interaction, values ​​and social activity of a person, his emotional well-being.
The current social situation requires a person to attract additional resources to form adequate adaptive capabilities to a changing world. However, not every person is ready to accept the new conditions of existence. Many people experience the rupture of old meaningful connections, the inability to acquire new ones, while simultaneously experiencing a need for them. Lack and/or "shallowness" of meaningful relationships causes acute negative feelings of loneliness. A lonely person is a subject experiencing difficulties in social interaction. Loneliness is a deep emotional experience that can distort perception, the concept of time and the nature of social actions.
Understanding the nature of loneliness will make it possible to develop optimal strategies for overcoming it, adequate for the current unstable and uncertain situation.

Loneliness of the elderly

Old age is sometimes referred to as the "age of social loss". This statement is not unfounded: old age as a phase of life is characterized by age-related changes in the human body, changes in its functional capabilities and, accordingly, needs, roles in the family and society, which often does not proceed painlessly for the person himself and his social environment.

From UN forecasts it follows that in 2001 the age of every tenth inhabitant of the earth exceeded 60 years. Western European countries, the USA, Canada and Japan are intensively “aging”. At present, life expectancy reaches 67 years in Russia, 76 years in the USA, 77 years in France, 78 years in Canada, and 80 years in Japan. The average age of the population is getting higher, and the number of children, adolescents and young people is declining, which qualifies as a "demographic revolution".

By 1995, the proportion of elderly citizens in the population of Russia (men over 60 years old, women over 55 years old) reached the highest high level for the period since 1959 and amounted to 20.6%. At present, 30.2 million Russians belong to the older generation.

The problems of social protection of the elderly are becoming especially relevant in modern conditions, when the old forms and methods of social support turned out to be unsuitable, and a new system of social protection that meets the requirements of a market economy is still being created.

Our society today is experiencing a socio-economic crisis. All the signs are evident: a decline in production and living standards, a disregard for morality and a collapse of trust in the norms of social civilization, an increase in crime and social disorganization, lies, corruption, apathy and distrust of the statements and actions of the authorities. The connection of generations will help restore the morality of society by transferring the traditions of the people, norms of behavior, universal mercy and prudence. The bearers and keepers of these values ​​are the generation of older people who have passed along with the country hard way development, wars, change of leadership and priorities.

In old age, the reality of aging brings with it many causes of loneliness. Old friends die, and although they can be replaced by new acquaintances, the thought that you continue to exist is not comfort enough. Adult children withdraw from their parents, sometimes only physically, but more often out of an emotional need to be themselves and have the time and opportunity to deal with their own problems and relationships. With old age comes fear and loneliness, caused by poor health and fear of death.

In order to best adapt to the environment, a person must have both someone to whom he is personally attached, and a wide network of friends. A deficiency in each of these different types of relationships can lead to either emotional or social loneliness.

All researchers agree that loneliness in the most general approximation is associated with a person's experience of his isolation from the community of people, family, historical reality, and a harmonious natural universe. But that doesn't mean that older people who live alone all experience loneliness. It is possible to be lonely in a crowd and with family, although loneliness among old people may be due to a decrease in the number of social contacts with friends and children.

Research by Perlan and his colleagues found much more evidence of loneliness among old single people who lived with relatives than among other old people who lived alone. It turned out that social contacts with friends or neighbors have a greater impact on well-being than contacts with relatives.

Contact with friends and neighbors reduced their sense of loneliness and increased their sense of self-worth and respect for others.

The level and causes of loneliness in the understanding of older people depend on age groups. People aged 80 and over understand the meaning of the term "loneliness" differently than other age groups. For the elderly, loneliness is associated with reduced activity due to disability or mobility, rather than lack of social contact.

Old age in real life is often such a period when help and support is needed in order to survive. This is the basic dilemma. Self-esteem, independence, and help that interferes with the realization of these feelings, come to a tragic contradiction. Perhaps, in the end, you will have to give up your independence, independence, because the extension of life is a sufficient reward for such a refusal.

There is another aspect of loneliness that men fall victim to more often than women. This is loneliness, which comes as a result of a warehouse of intellectual activity, along with a decrease in physical activity. Not only do women live longer than men, but they are generally less susceptible to the effects of aging. Older women, as a rule, manage to go headlong into the household more easily than men: "the industrious bee has no time to be sad." Most older women are able to dip into the little things. household more often than most older men. With retirement, the number of cases for men decreases, but the number of cases for his wife increases markedly. While a retired man loses his role as a "provider" of means of subsistence, a woman never partes with her role as a housewife. With the retirement of her husband, a woman reduces her household expenses, her health deteriorates and her vitality decreases.

The burden of care that falls on the shoulders of older women increases with the traditional age differentiation between spouses. In addition to taking care of their health, many older women take on the health of their husbands, and even more so as they age. The woman returns "back to the role of mother", now in relation to her husband. Now, it is her responsibility to make sure that he visits the doctor on time, monitor his diet, treatment and adjust his activities. Therefore, marriage is more beneficial for old men than for women.

And so, women are less prone to loneliness, since on average they have more social roles than men.

Studies have shown that widowed men are more lonely than married men, and there is no significant difference in feelings of loneliness among married and widowed women. Married men and women are less likely to experience loneliness than people who live alone; but again, men were more affected than women. Single men belonged to the group most affected by loneliness; men in the barque were the least susceptible to feelings of loneliness, women who are married, as well as living alone, occupied an intermediate position between the first two groups. Such data are partly explained by the difference in the organization of free time in older men and women. The results showed that two-thirds of single men are engaged in activities related to privacy, while over two-thirds of single women devote their free time to various kinds of social activities.

Sociologists' studies have shown that the majority of older people (56%) live with their children, and 45% of such families have grandchildren, 59% of pensioners have a spouse. Singles make up 13%. If among the surveyed pensioners the feeling of loneliness is noted as a real fact by 23%, then for the lonely this figure is 38%.

In solving the problem of loneliness, systems of social rehabilitation and social assistance to the elderly are becoming important. Social rehabilitation is a complex of socio-economic, medical, legal, professional and other measures aimed at ensuring necessary conditions and the return of this population to decent life in society.

mothers are single

The destruction of the family at the initiative of men is a very common phenomenon these days. Psychological reason such cases is male infantilism - the loss of a sense of responsibility for the birth and upbringing of children, the loss of a sense of fatherhood as essential components male character.

At the same time, the wife loses all rational orientation in her daily affairs and duties: she ceases to understand where she can count on her husband's help, and where she will have to take responsibility and hard worries on herself. As a result, the wife begins to unwittingly win the first position in the family hierarchy and be promoted to the role of an active leader, who takes care and full responsibility for the life of the family and the upbringing of children on her shoulders. Needless to say, this burden is unbearable and unnatural for a woman, therefore, a grumble about her bitter fate is always heard from her side. And the more a man behaves more frivolously and irresponsibly, the more this groan and murmur of the female soul is heard more strongly.

Thus, the loss by a man of the functions of fatherhood and patronage, sacrificial and active care for his wife and children, ultimately leads to the complete destruction of the order conceived by the Lord. family life. The wife acquires the function of the head of the family, which she carries out of necessity, often clumsily and hysterically, and the husband moves to the position of an adult, but unreasonable child, who also demands maternal behavior from his wife.

Violation of the spiritual hierarchy in the family and the deformation of the socio-psychological roles of men and women create an extremely unfavorable atmosphere for the development of the child's personality. The child is either relegated to the background for the mother (while the foreground is occupied by the husband, who behaves like a capricious and spoiled child), or becomes an idol, a kind of substitute for a failed marriage, on which unspent female love and affection splash out in abundance. Needless to say, in both cases the authority of the father and mother is undermined. Gradually growing up, sons and daughters absorb their souls with negative images of parental behavior, psychological scenarios and stereotypes of conflict communication, and, thus, they are prepared not for creation, but for the destruction of their own family. As a rule, the actual disintegration of the family occurs against the background of extremely perverse interpersonal relationships. A protracted family conflict creates a state of complete apathy, boredom, insensitivity and cynicism in a man, a feeling of a victim driven into a corner, experiencing panic horror before the problems that have piled on her, in children a state of loss (homelessness), loneliness and uselessness.

First of all, seven cores are needed. They are needed to stop feeling like a victim of someone's evil will, to overcome the feeling of fear for yourself and your children, the tendency to get nervous and panic for any reason when you have to take on purely masculine issues. At this moment, when a woman's soul is overwhelmed with resentment, when her heart is heavy with grief, any business turns into a test of her vitality, nerves, and volitional tension. A woman constantly acts through strength, stepping over her mental and physical infirmities.

After a divorce from her husband, sometimes you have to solve many issues that did not arise before. On the one hand, these are household and financial problems. On the other hand, the establishment of a normal microclimate in the house, where traces of former strife are still present. On the third - the adoption of paternal functions in addition to purely maternal functions. On the fourth side - the implementation of spiritual leadership in the family with the acceptance of full responsibility for the future of their children.

Only thanks to remarkable patience a woman can daily carry several roles and responsibilities at once. She now has not only to perform everyday women's duties (washing, cleaning, cooking, etc.), but, in addition, sometimes she no longer works at one, but at two or three jobs, running from one organization to another. Returning home in the evening brings new troubles: you need to check the lessons of the younger children, and also find an opportunity to talk heart to heart with the older ones, delving into their experiences and problems. Control everything, cheer everyone up, direct and, if necessary, scold, then console - and at the same time remain cheerful and cheerful! A woman has to hide her fatigue, her pain, her suffering, from her children, only occasionally allowing herself to cry out her anxiety about the present and future of an incomplete family in prayer.

In addition, a woman after a divorce should also be seven spans in her forehead. We can say that she should go beyond her natural abilities, since the tendency to think and reason is more characteristic of men. Now, living in an incomplete family, a woman cannot afford a purely emotional approach to business, since children will pay for any rash decision she makes.

Such reckless decisions, for example, include the desire to re-arrange one's personal life at all costs. The persistent search for a new husband often brings a situation, already very difficult, to the brink of a psychological disaster: there is a new husband who is completely unprepared to show generosity and take on the upbringing of other people's children. Invading an incomplete family, the new "mother's husband" often becomes a cruel tyrant for children. As a rule, a second marriage, concluded for emotional reasons, becomes an unbearable ordeal for a woman and her children.

Feelings of loneliness in adolescence

The social situation of today creates an extremely unstable system, against which the teenage subculture is changing. Being one of the least adapted and socially unprotected groups, adolescents cannot but bear the imprint of general social uncertainty, insecurity, and anxiety. The result of this was the coming to the fore, among other socio-pedagogical and psychological-pedagogical problems, the problem of teenage loneliness.

Psychologists identify several groups of factors that contribute to the emergence of loneliness in adolescence.

First group . These are some of the features of this age period. First of all, reflection development, which gives rise to the need of a teenager to know himself as a person, to understand himself at the level of his own requirements for himself. Play a role in the emergence of loneliness in adolescence and age-related crises typical of this period: crisis identity and self-esteem.

Another group of factors is the personality characteristics of a teenager: shyness, low self-esteem, excessive demands on oneself or others, unrealistic expectations and ideas about love, friendship and communication, etc.

There are also social factors leading to loneliness: rejection of a teenager by a group of peers (social attitude), rupture of friendships or lack of social circle and close friends, which can be a consequence of both the personality characteristics of a teenager and the result of the influence of situational reasons: moving to a new place of residence and school changes.

As a new group, factors related to the family of a teenager, including the type of family upbringing, are distinguished. Disharmonious family relationships(frequent conflicts, low culture of communication, lack of respect and trust between family members, physical violence) form ideas about interpersonal relationships as unpredictable and dangerous, which are best avoided.

It should also be noted that the impact of loneliness on a teenager also depends on the duration of the experience.

There are three types of loneliness:

temporary loneliness(short-term bouts of experiencing one's own isolation and dissatisfaction with communication in interpersonal relationships)

situational loneliness(is a consequence of stressful situations, death loved one, breakup, etc.)

chronic loneliness characterized by a person's lack of satisfactory communication, as a result of which he suffers from his isolation.

Chronic loneliness has the most serious consequences for adolescents, it can lead to emotional and behavioral deviations.

The teenage subculture of today includes a whole range of asocial manifestations that are regarded by teenagers as the norm. This is mentioned in the works of B.N. Almazov, L.A. Grishchenko, A.S. Belkin, V.T. Kondrashenko, A.E. Lichko. This trend indicates a change in the general outlook among adolescents, a change in the system of norms and values, and, as a result, a change in behavioral reactions. The actual result of this is the dynamics of individual feelings of a teenager in the direction of instability and negativity. One of the most acute experiences is the feeling of loneliness.

In social pedagogy, there is a description of many states close to loneliness, in particular, solitude (A.V. Mudrik), social alienation (O.B. Dolginova). However, these states are not considered in interrelation, as well as in dynamics. Meanwhile, the analysis of adolescent loneliness makes it possible to build a clear series of development of many similar conditions, which is the basis for predicting their socio-pedagogical consequences. A detailed analysis of many psychological, pedagogical and socio-pedagogical problems makes it possible to identify loneliness as a basic state, on the basis of which conflicts, complexes, tension, violations of the communicative sphere are formed.

Social loneliness is the result of a state of insufficient social organization, adaptation, as well as a consequence of the rupture of significant social ties and relationships. Psychologists distinguish two types of social loneliness: maladaptive, or conflict, and "loss" loneliness (death of a loved one, divorce of parents, etc.).

Psychological loneliness is a complex of intrapersonal experiences associated with “otherness”, “otherness”, non-recognition, resentment, as well as a consequence of a split in the image of I.

Describing loneliness as a psychological state, it should be said that it is connected, first of all, with a person's awareness and experience of his isolation and distance from other people. The experience of loneliness becomes painful if a person begins to perceive his remoteness from others as a lack of connections with people and the world, a lack of communication, attention, love, human warmth. Teenagers who experience this loneliness feel disconnected from others, while experiencing sadness, sadness, resentment, and sometimes fear. As a rule, they are not satisfied with their communication with their peers, they believe that they have few friends or do not have a true friend, a loved one who could understand them and, if necessary, help. For a number of different reasons, such adolescents do not always actively seek out friends or seek communication, but, in dire need of it, they are involved in negative or even asocial groups. Often, on the contrary, they avoid it in every possible way, which can also lead to a dangerous dead end.

Most authors emphasize the dual nature of the experience of loneliness and its impact on a teenager: on the one hand, it enriches the inner world, allowing you to feel the uniqueness of your existence, on the other hand, it can lead to behavioral deviations, depression, or even suicide.

The desire to be in a group, to be "like everyone else" in adolescence is very great. When a young person is offered to smoke, his decision is based on various factors. One of critical factors- fear of being alone, since the vast majority of teen companies are smokers. Short-term benefits are much more important than long-term ones. Previous experience also influences the decision. young man obtained in such situations. It is good if a young person himself is aware of all the factors initiating smoking (both momentary and distant). Then he can find alternative actions and understand his own reasons for making decisions.

The feeling of loneliness in adolescence is very painful; it often leads children to take risks and sometimes to heroin. By the way, it has long been noted that children from wealthy, so-called prosperous families, in which a son or daughter does not feel the need for pocket money, but are deprived of the spiritual care of adults, are more easily “addicted” to the needle.

“The loneliness of teenagers is growing in the same way as the loneliness of the elderly,” says an emergency psychologist. psychological help"Home Alone" Elena Sukhoparova. - Seven times a week, children who want to commit suicide turn to us: misunderstanding at all levels, discord in the family, domestic difficulties, unhappy love. A frequent topic is violence at school, fights after school: the child does not want to complain, but he cannot cope with the situation himself.

Own "I" in adolescence grows to enormous proportions and obscures the rest of the world. So it turns out that they are very, very lonely! Loneliness causes teens to have suicidal thoughts.”

P. Shirihev, head of the laboratory for the psychology of intergroup relations at the Institute of Psychology of the USSR Academy of Sciences, candidate of philosophical sciences, notes: “The main reason for suicide is a person's feeling of the meaninglessness of his existence. It has a connection with the situation in which this society is located, in particular with economic instability, ideological confusion, and reassessment of social norms of morality. As for large cities, which include Moscow, there is such a phenomenon here when a person feels terrible loneliness, having a lot of acquaintances and friends.

The study of the problem of loneliness of adolescents was devoted to the socio-psychological study "Adolescent 2001". It was attended by about 4,000 boys and girls aged 13 to 16, students of grades 8-11 of Moscow schools. The results of the analysis of young people's answers to the "Loneliness" questionnaire allow us to say that every third of them experiences a state of loneliness of varying intensity, and 2.3% of the respondents experience loneliness to a critically strong degree: acutely and constantly.

As a result of a study of more than 600 Russian teenagers, it turned out that every sixth of them is acutely experiencing loneliness. If in 1997 only 2.3% of adolescents experienced this feeling, then in 2003 it was 17%, and 2.7% of the respondents experienced it to a great extent. By the way, teenagers' ideas about loneliness change with age. At 13–14 years old, loneliness is described as a state of physical isolation, bad mood, boredom, sadness, sadness, fear; at the age of 15 - as horror, depression, resentment, chagrin; at the age of 16 - as a difficult experience, associated mainly with the absence of an understanding loved one ..

Conclusion

In Russia, according to the 1989 census, 10,126 thousand are single people, of which 6,805 thousand are women. Lonely in this case is a person who lives alone and does not maintain regular contact with relatives.

The specificity of Russian loneliness is such that it is primarily the result of the high mortality rate of the male population (Russian women live much longer than men) and mortality from unnatural causes (it is estimated that approximately one in three mothers has the opportunity to outlive their children). In addition, the general social and family disorganization, the lack of developed technologies for helping lonely people or those at risk of remaining lonely, turn loneliness in its Russian version into a rather malignant social disease.

Loneliness is one of the main social problems that are the subject of social work, and social work is one of the most important tools for eliminating or at least alleviating this social disease. Among the means of combating loneliness are socio-psychological ones: personal diagnostics and identification of individuals with an increased risk of loneliness, communicative training to develop communication skills, psychotherapy and psychocorrection to eliminate the painful effects of loneliness, etc.; organizational: the creation of clubs and communication groups, the formation of new social ties among clients and the promotion of new interests to replace those lost, for example, as a result of divorce or widowhood, etc.; socio-medical: education of skills of self-preserving behavior and teaching the basics of a healthy lifestyle.

Loneliness is an obligatory and integral part of human life, it has always accompanied a person's life, and will always exist as long as people exist. There is not a single person in the world who does not know what loneliness is. No one could in the past, can not in the present and will not be able to completely avoid loneliness in the future, no matter how much he would like to.

When assisting the lonely, it is necessary to take into account the variety of factors that lead to loneliness. Friendships, social environments and individual activities provide an alternative to medical intervention to help the lonely.

Helping lonely people sometimes should be about changing the situation, not the person.

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