Love from a scientific point of view. Love from the point of view of science. What goes on in the minds of lovers? Which is similar to people with obsessive-compulsive disorder. This is most likely the cause of our obsession when we are in love.
Feelings don't go unnoticed. What about scientific love?
Maybe understanding the mechanism of heart affairs can save you from fatal mistakes? Let's figure it out. So love is...
way to survive
There are some animal species that, like humans, live in pairs all their lives. Wolves, for example, or let's take a more romantic image - swans.
Before they form a “family” union, they go through three stages of intimacy: desire, inspiration and affection, directed to a specific object. The meaning of love between couples in animals is to save effort, so as not to be wasted on numerous applicants, but to focus on procreation.
Drug
Scientists have found that two areas of the brain responsible for “rewards” are excited during falling in love. Therefore, the question of whether, from a scientific point of view, many of them will answer: "Increased amount of dopamine in the body." It is this substance found in cocaine that causes a feeling of pleasure.
Addiction
What is love? From a scientific point of view - captivity, albeit sweet, but for someone bitter. It is difficult for a person to part with the object of his love. To do this, you need to create certain conditions: you need a complete immersion in new things, a different environment, a different team.
temporary phenomenon
The duration of love is from one and a half to three years. It is this time period that guarantees the participation of the father in the upbringing of a joint child. Subject to natural barriers (separation, one-sided feeling), love lasts much longer.
A period of high spirits and stupidity
When a person loves, the areas of the brain responsible for negative emotions and rational decisions go to sleep. That's why they say: "Love is blind."
Disease
Significantly low levels of serotonin - that's what love is. Scientifically, it can be treated with conventional medicines. The reason for this is the same dopamine, which turns off the human control system. It is not difficult to guess that love can be cured by increasing serotonin.
Source of depression
One-sided love gradually increases the content of dopamine in the human body, which, as expected, leads to an upbeat and inspired mood. Then the increasing level of the substance leads the person to a state of rage and exacerbation of love experiences. The final stage occurs when the level of dopamine drops significantly, depression occurs.
Feeling for novelty
A change of scenery can affect the revival of a feeling that has become familiar. Provided that the loving couple will do it consciously, real love become their constant companion.
Certain areas of the cerebral cortex
In men, this is the area responsible for vision, in women - for memory. Therefore, for a man, the appearance of his beloved is important, and for a woman - signs of attention that she will keep in her memories.
: psychologists, philosophers, biologists, chemists and even psychiatrists, but so far no one can give her an exact definition. What is love from a scientific point of view, many researchers are trying to understand, but the results almost always turn out to be ambiguous, causing lengthy disputes and discussions.
Biochemistry of feelings
Scientific definition of love chemical reaction organism, biochemists discovered, indicating a rather complex formula. From a chemical point of view, love is a special reaction, the exact formula of which is clear only to specialists. They argue that the feeling arises due to the release of the substance dopamine - the hormone of joy. However, this interpretation raises many questions because:
- a chemical reaction does not distinguish between such feelings as lust, falling in love, passion - the same substances are excreted by the body, but the depth of sensations is different;
- the formula is the same for creativity and love (many images are inspired by unrequited feelings);
- some researchers believe that feelings are an irrational concept and cannot be entered into chemical and mathematical formulas.
Therefore, love, as a feeling, cannot be explained from a chemical point of view, since by combining the elements of matter it is difficult to show all the nuances of emotions and distinguish love from other experiences similar to it. The philosophical definition of this feeling is also considered quite confusing for understanding love. Many researchers believe that love is an immensity in the world of measures. However, this definition also raises many questions for those who are not familiar with philosophy.
More precisely and more modernly, one of the prominent psychotherapists of our time, M. E. Litvak, gives the formulation of love:
“Love is an active interest in the life and development of the object of love.”
This concept corresponds to recognized scientific standards, as well as the provisions of practical psychology. That is why this formulation is considered one of the most modern.
What is love from a scientific point of view in psychology
The definition given by Litvak makes it possible to distinguish this wonderful romantic feeling from such definitions as falling in love, sympathy and thirst for love, longing and tenderness. Here is the exact interpretation of the concept described by M. E. Litvak in his books.
Interest can be passive or active. Passive - these are dreams, dreams. It is characteristic of sympathy, a thirst for love and falling in love, although some people in this state become active and seek the object of their sympathy. However, falling in love, unlike love, means an urgent need to be together, physical attraction and tenderness. It is selfish (desire to be loved), not sacrificial, unlike love. There is no genuine care, sacrifice, desire to correctly assess their capabilities and contribute to the development of their object of love in it.
Litvak shares love not only as concern for the well-being and development of others, but also for his own. Self-love becomes the base in such a situation. It is expressed in the formula: active interest in one's own life and development. This means that a person takes steps to become better, grows, works on himself, creates conditions for himself happy life. With this approach, he sees and feels the desires of a loved one, creating conditions for their implementation. And he can even give up his own desire to be with his beloved if he sees that close person it will be bad for him. That is why true love is completely uncharacteristic of jealousy, aggression, the desire to suppress and subordinate someone to one's desires.
Litvak writes about what is beautiful love from a scientific point of view in his books and contemporary literature. And, contrary to popular belief, this is not romance and passion at all. Yes, they also take place, but the very definition of love is not in them. He emphasizes that you can only buy affection, but not a genuine deep feeling. Modern love, from a scientific point of view, is also a helping hand in difficult situation(but not to the detriment of oneself), friendship, in which there is attraction, the desire for procreation, sexual contact, trust and tenderness.
It is this opinion that modern specialists in practical psychology adhere to today, who also work with married couples. They allow you to resolve various family conflicts and try to bring the couple to a common solution.
And yet none scientific definition love does not contain a general formula that reflects dreams under the moon, a million flowers from a loved one, his tenderness and passion, as well as the smile of his beloved woman, for whose happiness he is ready to give everything. And not a single definition of what true love is from a scientific point of view can convey all the facets of this wonderful feeling.
Love from a scientific point of view
You meet the one or the only one with whom you want to spend your whole life. At the same time, you are absolutely convinced that such love as yours simply does not exist in the world. But, according to experts, if the relationship between lovers develops in different ways, then the motivating feeling that couples in love create is always the same. And this feeling is regulated by factors beyond the control of man. It can be called chemical basis physical attraction.
Recently, scientists have discovered the presence in humans of an organ located on the nasal septum and determining the presence of pheromones, i.e., the smell of a potential partner. Previously, scientists believed that this organ functions only in lower mammals, but not in humans.
Dogs, rats, mice, whatever, all have this organ. And if its functions are disturbed before the period of puberty, then the animal stops looking for a partner, the element of sexual desire disappears. The same can be experienced by a person with impaired activity of this organ.
If a person sees and hears someone they find attractive, their organs pick up that person's pheromones, which triggers a series of biochemical processes. This complex of irritants can lead to the release of various chemical substances and hormones that cause certain feelings and experiences in a person. Experiments with mammals have shown that even the anticipation of sexual activity can cause the release of various neurotransmitters in the areas of the brain that are affected.
In other words, the process of courtship, and then sexual intercourse, causes chemicals to enter the brain, which allows you to experience pleasant feelings. Therefore, the individual, desiring a repetition of these sensations, continues this ritual. While people have different ideas about their ideal partner, research shows that men and women generally seek the same qualities: kindness, intelligence, reliability, and mutual love.
But there are gender differences as well, as revealed by a study that interviewed about 10,000 people from 37 countries.
The conclusions are: women everywhere dream of finding a man of means and social position who is ambitious, hardworking and older. Men, as a rule, value only two things - external attractiveness and, in general, young age.
Psychologists explain that such preferences reflect the process of evolution. Procreation underlies the attraction of a man to a young woman. beautiful woman. The woman seeks to find a man who will provide for her and the children and not leave them.
Does all this mean that people are slaves to biological forces that are beyond their control? Scientists believe that this is not necessary at all. You cannot control the psychological process when you are attracted to someone. It is extremely difficult to manipulate or interfere with this process. But what you can control with the tremendous flexibility that a person is endowed with is your actions. Our desires are incredibly complex. We are looking for intelligence, kindness, trust, a sense of humor, certain personality and physical characteristics. The individual can make a choice and determine which of these desires he prefers.
Now be honest - do you often think about serious things, such as, for example, marital relationships? Perhaps suddenly you realize: “something is not right”, there have been some changes. But what? If you want to test yourself, answer our questions - you and your husband. And then compare the results.
Marital relations. Test
1. If you had the opportunity to choose a life partner again, would it be him again?
A. No way.
B. I would have to think seriously.
B. Only he.
2. Do you enjoy meeting new people or do you prefer old friends?
A. I like old friends better.
B. I am attracted to new acquaintances and new people.
Q. Sometimes a little change won't hurt.
3. Which of you is more busy in the family?
A. My husband.
B. Naturally, I am.
B. I do not attach my homework no value.
4. What is your opinion about money?
A. This is the most important question, unfortunately, they are never enough.
B. Their lack can also threaten a good marital relationship.
B. This is not the main thing, but without them everything is not so simple.
5. How do you think your husband appreciates you?
B. More gratitude would not hurt me.
Q. Do I appreciate it?
6. Does your husband pay attention to your appearance?
A. He will always find some flaw in me.
B. He doesn't care what I wear or how I look.
B. Will always show interest.
7. Are you satisfied with the way you manage your household?
A. So-so.
B. This cannot be called an economy.
8. What is the relationship between you and your husband's parents?
A. I try to avoid them.
B. Treat them with respect.
B. I love them.
9. Do you enjoy spending holidays with your family?
A. I can't imagine anything else.
B. I don't care.
B. No, it's very boring.
10. Do you strive to improve, decorate your home?
A. I have other, more important concerns.
B. Yes, whenever possible.
Q. Sometimes I think about it.
Summing up(see table).
21-30 points. There seems to be something wrong with your marriage. As it appears, living together with you is heavy and unenviable. And will your husband's (or wife's) patience ever run out?
15-20 points. In general, you have normal relations in your family, even a little cool. Sometimes some tension in a relationship that arises in the end only strengthens the family, but try not to abuse it if possible.
14 points or less. Your marriage looks unrealistically perfect. You read desires and thoughts of each other in the eyes. But... Complete perfection can get boring over time. Do you think a change in life would hurt you?
The show was just joking. Test
“Marrying is stupid, and not getting married is even more stupid,” famous playwright Bernard Shaw joked about marriage ties. Well, if you have been “consisting” for a long time, how strong is your union? Take turns answering the test questions with your spouse. Before checking the results, note who volunteered to answer first. If the husband, then he is the real head of the family, if the wife - draw conclusions:
1. Can you say that you feel calm and comfortable at home?
2. Do you ever think about divorce?
A. No, never.
B. Yes, quite often.
3. Can you say that you have a friendly family?
4. If you could return the past? ..
A. I would choose the same person as my wife (husband).
B. Would choose another person or would not marry at all.
5. Have you ever had conflicts that had serious and lasting consequences for the family (departure of one of the spouses, etc.)?
A. Never has.
B. Everything happened.
6. Do you ever feel like coming home after work?
A. Yes, often.
B. Almost never.
7. Can you say that you always agree with each other in assessing your friends?
8. How often do you have disagreements about what kind of relationship to maintain with relatives?
A. Very often.
B. Almost never.
9. Do you want to go somewhere for a long time?
A. No, I don't want to.
B. Yes, I want to.
10. Do you often show tenderness and affection towards your wife (husband)?
A. Almost never.
B. Quite often.
11. Does your wife (husband) often show tenderness and affection towards you?
B. Very rarely.
12. Do you ever get on each other's nerves? A. It never happens.
B. Almost always.
13. How often do you have disagreements with each other about when and what to spend money on?
A. Very often.
B. Almost never.
14. How often are you dissatisfied with the way your wife (husband) performs her household duties?
A. This almost never happens.
B. Almost always.
15. How do you rate your marriage?
A. Unhappy.
B. Happy.
6. Do you like spending time together?
A. Like it.
B. Don't like it.
7. How has your attitude towards your spouse changed during your family life?
A. Improved.
B. Worse.
Now everyone add up the amount of points you have earned.
0-5 points. You (your spouse) are not satisfied with your marriage. The thought of divorce must have crossed your mind more than once (“marrying is stupid ...”). If your partner scored the same number of points as you, you are in trouble. However, there is no need to rush to the registry office. In the end, the stamp in the passport is a convention. Divorce symbolically, temporarily. Let one of you live for a while with your parents, friends or acquaintances. If you love each other, the result will exceed all expectations, and both of you will understand a lot about yourself.
6-12 points. You are not completely satisfied with your married life. Maybe the cause of the conflicts that arise lies in one of you. Check if both of you have taken points within this "fork". For example, you have 10 points, and your wife has 15. She is happy with everything, but you suffer. And in this case, it is she who needs to understand the true reasons for your dissatisfaction, otherwise the euphoria will pass, and the marriage will suffer.
13-17 points. If you are both in this “fork”, then you are happy and will do without extraneous advice. Happiness to you! In the end, Bernard Shaw was just joking.
Getting married is a simple matter. Test
Modern women have a philosophical attitude to the problem of marriage: “If you want to get married, do not look for a modern man. It's much easier to find just a man."
It is known that those tips that confirm their own choice are preferable, especially when it comes to a future life partner. But before you make the final choice, you need to take a closer look at your chosen one.
How to determine with which man in life you will always feel good, and with which - only flour? To begin with, you need to strive to notice everything.
If you don’t like something in the character of the chosen one, don’t try to change it - it will be worse for you.
We offer for analysis some of the most common types of behavior of men.
Depressed. It is rather not a type, but a transitional state. If you decide to date a man who has recently gone through a divorce, broke up with another woman, or had any other troubles, you should be prepared for the fact that at any moment he can lose his temper over a trifle.
If you like this man and you are ready to listen to his endless monologues-arguments about what happened, you do not need to refuse him. But you don't have to spend all your free time with him.
Business. He considers himself strong and almost omnipotent because he can book a table in a restaurant and arrange a meeting with the right people. He is self-confident and will strive to dominate everything. His approach to a woman is only one: either you accept me as I am, or we part. He will have the last word in everything - how to raise children, where to spend holidays, when to invite guests, etc. You can feel confident next to him, but as long as his business is going well. At the first failure, he can turn into a depressed and insecure person.
However, you can be afraid that this business person will treat you as his successful "acquisition".
Excellent student. This type strives to bring everything to perfection. If he is accidentally brought into a dating agency, he will present a whole list of those qualities that his chosen one should possess. He often tries to change the hairstyle, clothes and even the tastes of the woman he meets in accordance with his tastes. As a rule, she should be much younger than him and as compliant as she is kind. A woman should meet with an Excellent student only if she actually sees in his face a model and an example to follow.
The main danger, however, lies in the fact that when Pygmalion perfects his Galatea, he begins to look for a new object ...
Dreamer. This is a man whose plans are weakly connected with reality. In his Everyday life there is always some project that falls apart before the Dreamer even starts to implement it. The dreamer is not difficult to recognize: he changes one job after another and cannot work well with anyone. He dreams of changing the world, but in everyday life he is not even able to receive guests normally.
But for all that, this is not the worst option for marriage for a woman who herself has clear goals in life and is ready to take the family into her own hands.
Single. Imagine a calm person who likes to be alone for long periods of time. Many of them are nice, friendly people, but in order to feel good, they have to spend as much time without you as they do with you. Some of them just don't like noisy companies, they don't like empty talk. Single women are suitable for such women who are not offended by their “withdrawal into themselves” and the fact that sometimes they will have to visit without a husband. At the same time, a woman can be sure that if at this moment her husband is not with her, then not with another woman either.
Angry. This guy is slightly out of his mind. He is angry with his parents, with his former boss, with his current boss. Rude to everyone. Listen to his words - is it really someone else who is to blame for all his problems? He claims that all women are selfish, envious and cannot be trusted. Well, except for you, of course. This "except" gives you the opportunity to feel special and believe that all the bad things do not apply to you. He loves you and thinks of you differently than of others. He is not angry with you...
Unfortunately, sooner or later you will become a victim of his anger. Psychologists have established that Angry likes it when his wife objects to him in family scenes. After all, there is no winner without a fight?!
Unpolished diamond. At work, he is appreciated, his colleagues respect him, but at the same time they tease him. This is a man who achieved everything in his life himself! He is usually under forty, the suit looks like he slept in it, and the original color of the shoes is generally impossible to determine. He is usually looking for a woman to patronize in exchange for taking care of him, or a woman with a "classic" beauty who can raise him to her level and would like to get the stability she needs from him in life. Diamonds are very good students. They are the perfect choice for the woman who is not afraid to take risks. But you need to make sure that the diamond is not fake ...
Romantic. Fall in love almost instantly. After you talk to him for a few days, you will begin to feel smarter, slimmer and more beautiful than before. Feel like you have wings. But, unfortunately, the Romantic is a sprinter by nature, a sprinter. You will not have time to look back, and he has already caught a trace. Usually he is looking for contacts with girls with whom he can have fun, talk about love to the grave.
Romantic is the most suitable option for a woman who has recently gone through a personal drama or is simply depressed. He will quickly cheer her up and teach her to enjoy life again.
Responsible. He feels on his shoulders the responsibility for the family and even for friends. Clear, logical thinking allows the Responsible to move forward almost without error. Despite this, he is not boring and, avoiding unnecessary meetings and tedious evening entertainment, devotes a lot of time to sports or other healthy hobbies.
Thus, if on your life path you will meet such a responsible man, do not hesitate for a moment, grab him and get married right away!
Victim. This man can charm you almost at first sight. And only after some time you will begin to notice that someone else is to blame for all his failures. He is devoid of a sense of gratitude and in life remembers only those who caused him trouble. Sometimes he looks so upset and in need of participation that it is simply impossible to refuse him. Then he begins to convince you and himself that sometimes you can still meet real woman. And although these words sound like music, do not give in!
These are some of the most common types of men. What is a woman to do? She must understand who suits her best, and start looking for such a person, not forgetting to look around. If a woman begins to repeat incessantly that she needs a taller or richer husband, there is a danger that she may be left alone ...
Are you easily hurt? Test
It seems to you that you are the embodiment of calm, and your loved ones say that you are a bundle of nerves. Who is right?
You can check this with a test. Try to sincerely answer each of these questions. The answer "yes" - 2 points, "average" - 1 point, "no" - 0 points.
1. Are you easily turned on?
2. Do you consider yourself an impressionable person?
3. Do you do everything punctually and carefully?
4. Are you ambitious?
5. Are you easily scared?
6. Are you satisfied with your personal life?
7. Are you impatient too often?
8. Is it easy for you to decide to buy a new thing?
9. Are you easily irritated?
10. Are you jealous of anyone?
11. Are you jealous?
12. Do you feel insecure in the presence of your boss?
13. Do you think that you are indispensable in your workplace?
14. Are you short on time at work?
15. Do you have an inferiority complex?
16. Do you trust your loved ones, acquaintances?
17. Can you enjoy the little things?
18. Are you able to quickly forget all worries and troubles?
19. Do you smoke more than five cigarettes a day?
20. Do you smoke more than 20 cigarettes a day?
21. Do you smoke more than 30 cigarettes a day?
22. Do you sleep badly?
23. Do you feel bitter in the morning, good for nothing?
24. Do you react to changes in the weather?
25. At rest, is your heart rate 80 beats per minute?
26. Are you overweight?
27. Do you like movement, physical activity- running, walking?
28. Do you have pain in your heart?
29. Do you have bruises under your eyes?
30. Does noise annoy you?
31. Do you often have a headache?
32. Do you suffer from stomach pains?
33. Do your palms sweat when you're nervous?
34. Do you like eggs, butter, salo?
35. Do you crave sweets from time to time?
36. Do you drive your car to work or go shopping?
And now let's check how strong our nerves are.
If you have from 1 to 6 points, then you can congratulate yourself. You are Iron Felix. I wonder how you manage to not react to anything?
From 7 to 13 points. You're still fine, but it's time to think about your nerves. If you do not want the situation to become more complicated, take care of your psyche from stress.
From 14 to 20 points. You are now depressed by some nervous situations that you find yourself in. Try to establish as much distance as possible in relation to people, contact with which causes a rapid heartbeat and sweating of the palms.
From 21 to 30 points. You react very strongly to stressful situations and you should consult your doctor. Maybe you have a toothache and it weakens your mental endurance? Try to walk more, and not sit at home watching TV.
More than 31 points. The situation is catastrophic. You are more than vulnerable, and this, apparently, is the cause of all your conflicts with loved ones at home and colleagues at work. Think about "restructuring" your lifestyle. Rest as much as possible, but not on the sofa under the blanket, but on fresh air with your boyfriend who will boost your mood.
Do you know him? Test
You see him often, you like him, but are you sure that you really know him? Ask him ten questions of this test, and ... you risk being surprised, but he ...
1. Of these three styles of clothing, which one does he prefer with women?
A. Boyish (jeans, caps, T-shirts).
B. Feminine (modest and strict).
B. Extravagant clothes (large jewelry, the latest vagaries of fashion).
2. Of these three points, which one appeals to him the most?
A. His work (institute, social activities).
B. Love.
B. Male friends.
3. If they tell him about marriage, he answers:
A. "Well, well, that's funny."
B. "Let's talk about something else."
Q. "Need me to think one day."
4. Imagine that he decided to spend the evening with you.
A. He gives you a detailed program for the evening.
B. He likes to improvise more, rely on chance.
Q. He asks you to come up with something.
5. What quality attracts him the most in a girl?
A. Integrity.
B. Common sense.
B. Coquetry.
6. Which of the shortcomings infuriates him?
A. Your tendency to be in a bad mood.
B. Tears for any reason.
B. That you are late for a date.
7. Which of these three actresses does he like?
A. Ludmila Gurchenko.
B. Irina Alferova.
W. Alisa Freindlich.
8. He was very fond of one girl, but when it became clear that feelings pass and you need to “finish”, he ...
A. Doesn't want to see or know her anymore. It's all over - period.
B. At least once he tries to find out the relationship with her, to explain himself.
V. Says: "We can remain friends."
9. What sport interests him the most?
A. Skiing, athleticism, running.
B. Chess.
W. Tennis.
10. To which of these three actors does he give his sympathies?
A. Mikhail Boyarsky.
B. Vyacheslav Tikhonov.
V. Igor Starygin.
Now that he has answered, look at the results together.
Solve him (in his presence).
Count how many times “your” young man leaned towards opinion A, B, or C. The largest number of B, for example, corresponds to man B, etc.
So he named himself.
Man A. You may even be too self-admiring and self-confident. Know that you are a little frivolous: you like a girl to obey you, and at the same time you would like it if she replaced you, if I may say so, a male friend. Choose!
Your cruelty, you know, is only superficial.
It is in your taste to behave impulsively: it is very likely for you to find yourself tomorrow in the company of people whom you did not yet know today, or to become the object of antipathy to such an extent that you feel like you were born into this world for nothing. Yes, you are adorable and you know it! Try not to play too hard on this: you run the risk of running into a serious disappointment.
Husband B. Your love of adventure and cheerful disposition, your shyness and collectedness suggest that you are both very sensitive and harsh. You are not far from the ideal of girls, especially young ones. You do not tolerate noise and fuss, at the same time you are able to show genuine tenderness. Still less nervousness! .. Think about it. There are many other people around you, and they are looking at you.
Man V. You're in trouble, that's for sure. When will you finally assert yourself and feel confident?
Think about this: you are an ideal confidant for a woman, but as a rule, they rarely get carried away. Women are much more demanding than you think. You are not without charm, but you clearly lack mystery. But girls love secrets so much ... And then, try to be less talkative. And at least sometimes listen to what they tell you, and most importantly, talk less yourself.
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From the book MMIX - Year of the Ox the author Romanov Roman From the book Freedom of Love or Idol of Fornication? author Danilov stauropegial monasteryFrom the point of view of Eternity, a fragmentary view of Being is not a holistic, not a chaste view - in other words, an unreliable, false view. When we think of the world as original, and attribute the emergence of life to His Majesty chance, then this is a false view of the world. But we
Some of them you probably know, but some may surprise you!
1. Love is like cocaine
If you make a tomography of the brain of a person in love, you can notice one interesting detail: he will have very strongly excited two zones responsible for the so-called reward system. Scientists attribute this to the effect of increased doses of dopamine, a substance that usually causes a feeling of pleasure. It is curious that with such force these areas of the brain react only to cocaine.
2. Love as a way of survival
Animals that form long-term couples have three stages in relationships: desire, infatuation, affection. Desire is a sexual drive that is not directed at someone (zoologists call this word states that are based on basic needs: satisfying hunger, thirst and sexual desire). Passion is a fixation on a particular object. Attachment is a strong bond designed for a long-term breeding program. Scientists have found that romantic love in humans is a modified form of infatuation in animals. It appeared with our ancestors as a way of survival. In other words, love helps to save efforts so as not to scatter, but to achieve one partner in order to continue the family.
3. Love lasts from 1.5 to 3 years
There is a biological meaning here: such a period guaranteed the participation of the father in the first, most difficult months of the life of the mother and child of our ancestors. In the presence of barriers, such as non-reciprocity, separation, a strong discrepancy in schedules, love can last much longer.
4. Love is blind
German researcher Andreas Barthel found that areas normally active in the brain of an unloved person are asleep in lovers. These are zones of negative emotions and rational decisions.
5. Where does depression come from?
A person who is unhappy in love goes through two stages. At first, dopamine levels rise even more. The result of such an overdose is rage and an even more heightened sense of love. But sooner or later the second phase comes. Dopamine falls below average levels, which causes depression.
6. Love is an addiction
Since love is similar in effect to cocaine (see point 1), scientists recommend treating unrequited love in the same way as drug addiction. It is necessary to remove incentives and reminders - throw out all the photos, do not call and do something completely new. Full restart.
7. Love can be treated with drugs
Like maniacs who have no control over their actions, lovers in the blood undergo serious chemical changes. They have greatly reduced serotonin, an important hormone. Scientists blame the already mentioned dopamine for this: a natural drug that pushes us to frenzy, which turns off the control system. The statistics of crimes motivated by love is such that in America they are seriously talking about her treatment with pills.
8. Serotonin kills love.
If you give a mouse a large dose of serotonin, it will reject its regular partner and begin to mate with anyone. They explain it this way: serotonin reduces the level of dopamine, and at the same time - the degree of love (but not attraction). It is important to remember that the level of serotonin increases under the influence of modern antidepressants.
9. Novelty Saves Love
Arriving in a foreign country, finding themselves in an unfamiliar hotel, many couples are again capable of madness. In response to any novelty, dopamine is again released in high concentrations in the brain, and it can short-circuit old electrical circuits, for example, the same drive of love. In general, American psychologists have been routinely advising all couples to have a date night once a week for many years. But you can't go to the same restaurant all the time. We need to look for novelty.
10. Men love with their eyes.
In men, during the period of falling in love, the cortex area becomes more active. hemispheres responsible for vision. So it’s not for nothing that they say that men love with their eyes. In women, the zone associated with memory is more active: the instinct remembers the behavior of a partner for several weeks, and then analyzes the information received in order to properly weigh the pros and cons. As a result, women remember all the details of the first phase of the novel much better. By materials.
On the tomography of the brain of a person in love, it can be seen that the zones responsible for the reward system are excited in him. This is explained by the action of the hormone dopamine, which causes a feeling of pleasure. This is how the brain reacts to powerful narcotic substance - cocaine. At the same time, at the beginning of the appearance of a feeling, the level of dopamine rises very strongly, and then falls below normal, which can cause depression. Since love feelings are similar in effect to cocaine, unrequited love can be cured. This is done as in the case of drug addiction: all reminders and incentives are removed from a person’s life, and the empty space is filled with something new, for example, another hobby or an interesting hobby. In animals that bind themselves in long-term relationships, biologists distinguish stages of desire, infatuation, and affection in their union. Desire is explained by basic needs, passion for fixation on a particular object, and thanks to attachment, animals develop a strong bond when they are ready to breed and raise offspring for a long time with one individual. Human love is scientifically similar to animal infatuation. She appeared with the aim of procreation and helps to save effort, not to waste her energy, but to achieve only one partner. It is believed that the feeling of love lasts from 1.5 to 3 years, and then it is replaced by mutual respect, habit. Such a period guarantees the participation of the father in the most difficult time of raising a child. In some cases, for example, during separation, strong love feelings can last longer. No wonder it is believed that love is also blind. German scientists have found that a person in love turns off brain areas responsible for rational thinking and negative emotions. In lovers, the level of serotonin is greatly reduced, the control system is turned off. Because of such chemical changes in the body, some people go to crime, suicide, so some scientists are inclined to think that unhappy feelings should be treated with pills. Treatment should be aimed at increasing the amount of serotonin in the body, modern antidressants successfully cope with this. Strong changes in the environment can save fading love. In response to them, the brain receives an increased dose of all dopamine, so dating in a romantic setting, relaxing together can save a falling apart relationship. From a scientific point of view, love is very different for representatives of different sexes. A man really loves with his eyes, as the lover increases the activity of those parts of the cerebral cortex that are responsible for vision. But for women, love is associated with memory, so she remembers the behavior of her partner, analyzes the information received and draws conclusions about the possibility of further building relationships.
