How to be happy. how to be happy every day what to do to be happy

Hello dear readers! Today I would like to talk about happy life about how to live in order to be happy. After all, many people drive themselves into the framework of misfortune, hope for a miracle, wait for magic. In fact, everything is within us. If you can understand a few simple things, then you can be happy no matter what the circumstances.

What is happiness

Let's start with the definition of happiness. For someone, being happy means being rich or successful, having a yacht and a castle in Europe, becoming famous, being revered by a large circle of people, and so on. I want to reveal to you a terrible secret - all this has nothing to do with human happiness.

Having achieved wealth, you only reach a certain goal. There comes a moment of satisfaction, and then. The goal has been reached and it is no longer needed. Either a new task is set, or there is a fear of losing the wealth achieved. Thus, we understand that happiness is not in wealth. The same is true with success. A person achieves a certain success. The goal has been reached. Satisfaction. Fear of losing your success.

People change things often. Being happy does not mean rejoicing at another thousand rubles in your wallet, it does not mean rejoicing at a new relationship.

Do not confuse the emotions of joy, satisfaction with happiness. Happiness is something that is always inside the person himself.

It is always with you, you just have to let it out. It does not depend on your financial condition, it is not affected by your relationships with others, it does not care about your achievements and successes. All these components help you experience emotions of joy, pleasure, as well as negative emotions: fear, disappointment, pain and bitterness.

What prevents a person from being happy? It is the substitution of concepts and the unconsciousness of happiness within oneself. If you can separate your emotions from happiness, even when you are sad, you are on the right path to a happy life.

If you can separate your happiness from the husks of fleeting emotions, then you will be happy for the rest of your life.

The working process

For some comrades, happiness lies in a successful, well-paid job. Don't associate happiness with job satisfaction. Quietly continue to work and do not associate the office with your internal state. , work is often accompanied by stress, rush jobs, reporting, burning deadlines, and so on. Are you going to let all of this affect your personal happiness?

Work is your way of earning money for your maintenance. Work is your opportunity to realize your potential. Here you have to be focused, self-confident.

If you are not sure that your work is your calling, then I recommend that you read my article "". But remember that calling also does not in any way affect your happiness. Thanks to the vocation, you can achieve great success in a certain business, it brings pleasure, satisfies your desires and needs. No more.

Remember that work is just a part of your life. A part cannot affect the whole happiness. It does not consist of a piece of work, a piece of family, a piece of communication, and so on. Happiness is very complete. It is all, entirely, within you. It's worth just looking at it.

Personal life

Another misconception: my happiness depends on the other person, if I'm lonely, then I'm unhappy. The most, in my opinion, a terrible misconception. Human happiness cannot depend on who he lives with. Today with one, and yesterday with another, and ten years will pass and there will be a completely different person next to me. So what happens? Every time your happiness determines new person?

Fifth advice- read the article "". There you will find a sea of tips that may interest you.

Tell me, what is happiness for you? How do you imagine your happiest day? What helps you overcome difficulties in life? Do you have a secret cure for depression?

I hope you discover the secret of happiness within yourself and never be unhappy in your life!

Probably, each of us dreams, waking up one morning, to feel the maximum of happiness and peace of mind. Happiness is the state of complete satisfaction with one's own life. This is purely subjective.. Looking at a person from the outside, we can only guess whether he is happy. Only he himself feels it.

The feeling of happiness never depends directly on the status, financial opportunities, social environment, etc. Often, people with material wealth, many friends and a good family feel unhappy. And sometimes a person who is not particularly wealthy, with a difficult fate, can experience real happiness. Everything here depends entirely on us.

What affects the feeling of happiness

Values. Each of us has a certain set of significant values ( "to love and be loved", "family", "interesting work", "freedom", "permanent development" etc.), and if they are present in our lives, then the feeling of happiness does not leave us.
Achievement of the set goals. For some, simple and quickly achievable goals prevail, for others, ambitious and requiring great effort. But one way or another, the main criterion of happiness here is the result.
Satisfaction of needs. The key is to satisfy precisely those needs that a person puts at the head. You can be a hungry artist, but if recognition or self-expression is the most important thing for him, and this is realized, then he big share probabilities will experience happiness. But if the most significant needs regularly remain unsatisfied, then the person is unhappy.
. If we are satisfied with ourselves and adequately evaluate ourselves, then we become more confident and feel inner harmony. If we are not in harmony with ourselves, constantly engaged in self-digging, then we cannot feel completely happy.
Health. Health problems are always more or less reflected in the feeling of happiness. Therefore, it is important to be attentive to your condition in order to be able to prevent serious violations in time.

What prevents you from being happy

Unfortunately (or fortunately, sorry for the tautology), our own attitudes, beliefs, and thoughts almost always interfere with being happy.

Creating obstacles. Quite often, we ourselves come up with various difficulties and obstacles on the way to happiness, believing that it is not easy and you have to pay for everything. It seems that true happiness must be gained through suffering, won... But paradoxically, while we are struggling with fictitious barriers and obstacles, it goes away, and we do not notice it. We don't let ourselves be happy. .
The burden of the past. Being happy is often hindered by negative events that have ever happened to us. The experiences associated with them constantly bring us back to that time, and we fixate on the problems of the past.

Wrap around. It simply cannot be such that nothing pleases and at least for a moment is not a reason for happiness. It is made up of little things. You have been complimented, you have successfully completed an important task, your baby smiled at you, you attended an interesting event… Every day we have many reasons to be happy. Our task is to notice them and rejoice.

Listen to the singing of birds, the rustle of grass in the wind and leaves underfoot - beneficial actions for inner peace and connection with the world. Rejoice in the simplest things. They charge with positive energy and allow you to distract from bad thoughts, feel happier.

Break the vicious circle.

For example, we may be sad that we do not achieve what we want. But we don’t achieve it because we sit and do not take any actions (or act in the wrong way), since all thoughts are occupied with unnecessary experiences and the search for the guilty ones. And often it seems that this circle cannot be broken. We are still waiting for circumstances to change dramatically or for some great luck to fall on us. The probability of this is low. And the only way out is in ourselves. You need to break the circle by stopping worrying and starting to act. Any steps and attempts to change the situation or attitude to life will bring you closer to happiness.

Get carried away.

You should definitely have something to your liking - something that inspires you and energizes you. Engaging in creativity, sports allows you to express yourself and cope with stress. But it may not be just a hobby. For example, the realization of oneself as a mother, a caring wife, doing household chores also allows you to feel truly happy woman at any age: both in 20 and in 40 years.

Rest and.

If you are exhausted and don't get enough sleep on a regular basis, you can hardly feel completely happy. Healthy sleep not only helps to restore strength, but also bring thoughts and feelings in order.

Follow your goals and finish what you start.

The more completed cases you have in your piggy bank, the freer and more harmonious you will feel. and do not retreat from them when faced with obstacles.

Breathe happiness into another person's life.

The more often you do good deeds and please others, the happier you will become. Positive energy from your good deeds will definitely come back to you. Such is the pattern. Give gifts to others, say nice words, provide support, do charity work. The feeling that you are changing the world for the better helps you understand how you become happy.

Look to the future not with fear, but with hope.

Stick to the principle and constantly remind yourself: Now it's good, but it will be even better". Make plans and look forward to their implementation. The more actively you can act and realize your plans, the more interesting the future will seem to you.

Have in your arsenal a list of life-affirming phrases that uplift your mood and make you feel happier. For example:
"I'm getting better and better at coping"
"I like myself"
“There are many pleasant moments in my life,” etc.
Weigh your "I want" and "I'm afraid".

It is most convenient to write them down on paper in 2 columns. Try to remember as many of your "I want" and "I'm afraid" as possible. Well, if the first turns out to be much more than the second. After all, the energy of desires always inspires us, makes us more confident, and the energy of fears slows down actions, forcing us to abandon our intentions.

How to be a happy wife

When creating a family, a woman always wants to become happy and loved. What helps to achieve this?

It is important to remain feminine, affectionate and attractive. Let your men feel like reliable defenders and knights next to you. This is a powerful stimulus for self-realization.
Show care and attention towards your husband. Smile while waiting for him to return from work, ask how his day went, give him the opportunity to fully relax, delight with delicious food.
Maintain a man's self-esteem: praise him, recognize his achievements and abilities.
Do not be too demanding of your husband, do not control his every step. He needs to feel a certain degree of freedom and independence.
Maintain comfort and order at home, keep it clean, create comfortable conditions for family life, take maximum care of children. A man is always in a hurry to return to a warm home.
Give your love, seek physical intimacy, trust him and respect him.

How to become a happy mom

For most of the fair sex, the question of how to become a happy woman is equated with the task of becoming a happy mother.

Feel the joy of every contact with your child: when he smiles at you, when you feed him, when you sing a lullaby and watch him fall asleep, when you play with him and just talk.
Allow yourself to relax and do personal things, because the child needs a lot of your attention and care. You need to restore your strength and recharge with positive energy. Don't forget about proper sleep and your hobbies.
Love yourself and show your child self-confidence. This will allow you to be convinced that "I am a good mother and doing everything right."
Be active and emotional when interacting and playing with your baby. The more pleasant emotions you experience with him, the higher your satisfaction with motherhood will be.
Try to trust the child at any age, encourage his initiative and respect his personality. He feels it and will treat you the same way.
Rejoice in the development of your child, notice the positive impact of your educational impact.
Be flexible when raising your baby, listen to his needs and mood.
Visit cultural events with your children more often. Interest is provided both to you and to them.
Children develop us and change us for the better. Be open to this experience. They really have a lot to learn.

We summarize all of the above in the following lines:

Happiness decorates our lives

Sow the seeds of it in your soul,

And hurry to give it to others.

All good things will come back - believe in it!

Video on how to become a happy woman.

Every person deep down dreams of becoming happy and everyone strives for this. But look around: how many happy people will you see? Here, in my opinion, is a paradox: everyone wants happiness, but few manage to feel it in Everyday life, not once, but regularly or even often.

At some point along the path to happiness, most people experience a "failure". In this article, I will consider the causes of such "failures" and propose a strategy,.

As the article progresses, I invite you to answer questions so you can better understand your relationship with happiness. I recommend that you answer the proposed questions in writing - so you can really understand something new about yourself and apply the psychological ideas described here to your life.

What is happiness

In my opinion, happiness is not only about emotions, because emotions cannot be constantly maintained at the same level. But you can organize a certain way of life for yourself so that you can live the life you want.

Turn to yourself and think:

What is happiness for you?
What makes you a happy person?

Happiness is a feeling, you either feel it or you don't. To see the possibilities how to become a happy person, it is important to understand your personal idea of happiness. That is, first you need to understand WHAT you want to do, organize in your life, and then HOW you can do it.

If you find it difficult to immediately answer these questions, remember: When was the last time you felt like a happy person. Relive these memories, immerse yourself in them, feel the echoes of that happiness. And then analyze what caused you to feel happy in that situation. Perhaps what made you happy then will help you figure out how to be a happy person now.

The feeling of happiness is made up of your satisfaction with different areas of your life: family, work, friends, home, leisure, hobbies. Note that the feeling of satisfaction is purely subjective, there are no external criteria in it. What matters is what you feel and think.

For example, outwardly everything in your life looks great: you have a family, work, housing, your life is filled with communication with different people. But you do not feel like a happy person, on the contrary, you often feel sad, depressed, apathetic. Other people may say: “What are you?! Everything is good in your life!” You believe them, drive your unpleasant feelings away, but you still can’t feel happiness.

In this example, it turns out that a person is guided by external criteria and other people's idea of happiness. But what is happiness for one person will not be happiness for another. The question "How to become a happy person" is individual and subjective, and only you can give yourself a specific answer.

Here we come to the first important step on your path to happiness - to understand what you want. But it's not as easy as it might seem at first glance.

The answer “I want to become a happy person” will not work here, more specifics are needed. And your answers to the questions of the previous part of this article - about your personal idea of \u200b\u200bhappiness will help you with this. Think about what you need to feel happy.

I want to live like this or "this is how it should be"

First reason. Since childhood, we all have been told a lot how everything should be ... In this way, people learn to adjust their lives to “the way it should be”, “as is customary”, “like everyone else”. But this path does not answer the question of how to become a happy person for you. It has nothing to do with your personality, and this is one of the reasons for possible “failures”.

Refer to your answers to the questions about happiness from the previous part of this article. Consider whether these answers reflect your personal view, or whether they relate more to conventional ideas about happiness. Pay attention to the emotions that arise:

How do you feel when you think about your happiness?
Do you have an emotional response and does the desire to become a happy person light up inside?

Absence vivid emotions is a sign that your answers do not fully reflect your personality. And then it is important to filter your personal desires and ideas from the "generally accepted".

I know what I want, but I'm scared - suddenly it won't work out

The second reason. You know what you want, but you are afraid to try, to take risks. You're scared that you won't succeed. This state is illustrated by the saying “Better a titmouse in the hands than a crane in the sky”. You persuade yourself that it is so good, but occasionally you still continue to dream about “how it could be different.”

It turns out that you have certain restrictions inside you that prevent you from moving freely towards your happiness. You know how to be a happy person, but you don't act out of fear.

Trial and error is natural. And indeed something may not work the first time. When something doesn't work out, you can change your strategy and try something different. But if you're afraid to even try change your life, you are controlled by irrational internal constraints.

And these restrictions can be checked against reality.

Feel what exactly you are afraid of?
What happens if you suddenly try and you don't succeed?
How will you feel if you fail?
What will failure mean to you?

Answer these questions and analyze how real your fears are.

Such an analysis can lead you to an understanding of your deepest irrational beliefs. For example, you may be afraid of making a mistake, of feeling like a failure, or of the possible catastrophic consequences of doing the wrong thing.

Try to relate your fears to reality. Think about what you can do if something doesn't work the first time. When you imagine what you will do with different options developments, fears cease to slow you down. And then you can freely begin to implement your strategy on how to become a happy person.

If at this first step you encounter difficulties in one of the options discussed above, this may be an occasion to reflect, spend more time analyzing these difficulties, or seek the help of a psychologist.

It can be difficult to feel and decide on your own how to become a happy person for you: understand your desires, get rid of irrational restrictions and just believe in yourself. When I work with the topic of happiness in psychological counseling, I help you access your desires, recognize social stereotypes and obligations that affect you, and replace “interfering” factors with supportive ones.

In the next article, I will continue to talk about the strategy of how to become a happy person.

Modern society, according to psychologists, is undergoing a serious transformation. Over the past decades, women's and men's roles in society have changed significantly. In connection with the new opportunities, women have become much more independent and wealthy, which made them more picky about choosing a life partner. Many of the fair sex, due to a busy work schedule, simply physically does not have the strength for their family and children. As a result, they remain self-sufficient and lonely. But are you happy? How to become a happy woman if you are alone? Today we decided to discuss this topical and serious issue.

Feminine energy: what is a woman for?

A woman is an amazing creature, which, for all its external fragility and tenderness, has an incredible strong energy. This energy allows the fair sex to bear the burden of responsibility for the family, support their husband, raise children and make a career. It is believed that for all this it is necessary to possess amazing strength. So where does she come from in a woman?

The fact is that the purpose of a woman is the search for happiness and love. She was created to wrap love around her loved ones and take care of them. Only then can a woman be happy and her life filled with meaning. Have you ever noticed that men are drawn to some of the fair sex, although they may not be distinguished by beauty and wealth? But they run away from others like fire, despite the fact that they are well-groomed and self-sufficient. What is the secret of female attractiveness? It lies precisely in energy, men always feel amazing when they meet the same girl filled with female attractiveness. And then they no longer pay attention to appearance and other trifles, wanting to give all their time to their chosen one, from whom they receive warmth in return.

Based on all this, it is not surprising that most women associate the feeling of happiness with the presence of a man in their life. And with all their inherent strength and enthusiasm, they rush in search of the only one who can give them an incredible life. After all, in their opinion, it is simply impossible for a single woman to become happy. Or does such a possibility exist?

Single or free: a look at the problem

Russian society in many of its features retains the patriarchal traditions of its ancestors. This is very different from our compatriots from Western women. Naturally, these differences affect the attitude towards marriage and life in general. Western ladies do not wonder how to become a happy woman if you are alone. For them, this is a completely normal existence. After all, the feminist movement originated precisely in the West, where women actively fought for their rights and freedoms. Their mentality contains the concept that a woman who lives without a husband is free and a priori happy. After all, she is not bound by the bonds of marriage, duties and restrictions. She can independently choose her work, friends, place of residence and hobbies. No one can dictate their conditions to a free woman and make her financially dependent on a man. Beautiful picture, is not it? It is their freedom and independence that Western ladies cherish more than anything else.

In Russian society, according to tradition, a woman must be married. Otherwise, she is considered a loser, who eventually becomes the subject of ridicule and gossip of more "lucky" friends. After all, it is not customary for us to call unmarried free - they are lonely with us. How can a single woman become a happy woman? Without men, life is boring and gray ... So our women rush into the maelstrom of passions, looking for that same Prince in everyone they meet. But often such adventures end in disappointment and return the woman to a state of loneliness. But happiness is always wanted and at any age. So how to become a happy woman if you are alone?

Causes of female loneliness

Of course, there are many reasons for female loneliness. But still, psychologists identify several basic prerequisites for becoming lonely. It is with this problem that more than seventy percent of the fair sex come to the office of psychotherapists. We identified three reasons:

1. Feminism

IN last years feminist ideas have entered the minds modern women, and they began to deliberately refuse relationships with men. Such representatives of the fair sex spend all their energy on a career and become quite successful and independent. Their life looks rich and varied. Such ladies are quite open about their views and often even begin to conduct trainings "How to become a successful and happy woman."

2. Selfishness

The sudden opening of opportunities showed women that life can be incredibly beautiful and carefree. Therefore, many began to pay great attention to the financial component of the relationship. They consider candidates based on wealth and position in society. As a result, they often cannot find a worthy man. Or each new romance with a contender for a hand and heart ends without going into the stage of a serious relationship. After all, a man, noticing such an attitude towards himself, also does not seek to see other qualities in a woman, except for external attractiveness. And obviously will not make her a cherished proposal.

3. Excessive demands on men

Most modern women have begun to make excessive demands on their men. They began to consider themselves worthy of a better share than cleaning the house, cooking and taking care of their husband. This trend has also affected married ladies, who have begun to file for divorce en masse from those who, in their opinion, are no longer worthy of their attention.

Be that as it may, but many of the women, having become lonely for the reasons listed above, are increasingly turning to psychoanalysts for advice. Which suggests that they do not feel happy at all. What is the reason? And how to feel the fullness of life again and become happy?

Types of female loneliness

Psychologists say that all women who are wondering how a single woman can become happy (without a man) can be divided into two categories:

disappointed;
free.

Ladies from the first category become lonely due to resentment and disappointment in men. They desperately want to get married, but are very afraid to experience pain again and are in constant conflict with themselves. As a result, a woman turns into a constantly complaining and evil person who, with her energy alone, repels men.

The second category of single women chose her own path. No, once they could be in a couple, but in this life situation they are alone, and this is their conscious choice. Such representatives of the weaker sex are not deprived of male attention, but they do not build serious relationships. This is due to several very common psychological attitudes:

make a career, and then start a family;
gain financial independence;
the desire to command the male sex and decide everything on their own.

Both types of female loneliness sooner or later end in depression, because any of the women feels her true destiny and seeks to create a family with a worthy representative of the strong half of humanity.

In search of happiness: how not to be lonely?

If you are single and strive to start a family, seeing this as your happiness, but you just can’t meet that very man, then you should approach these searches from the point of view of science and psychology. First of all, a woman should look at herself from the outside, because men are extremely sensitive and always subconsciously repel some female types. Perhaps that is exactly what you are. Keep in mind that men especially avoid the following two types:

1. Woman-man

No, we're not talking about looks. A woman with a masculine character can be surprisingly attractive and beautiful, but an overly tough character will prevent her from building a happy relationship. Such ladies always know what they want, listen little to other people's opinions, do an excellent job with all men's housework and have good earnings. Men usually do not experience physical attraction to such ladies and try not to start a relationship with them.

2. The Snow Queen

These women are simply flawless in appearance. They always have time to take care of themselves, even in a busy work schedule, they will find a couple of hours to go to a beauty salon. The Snow Queen is completely focused on herself and her feelings, she is concerned that under no circumstances should she lose the feeling of her perfection. Therefore, men with such beauties often feel uncomfortable and tend to break up with them as soon as possible.

If you recognize yourself in these descriptions, then start serious work on yourself, and the man of your dreams will definitely appear in your life.

In some cases, a woman remains single after a painful divorce. She may have children in her arms, and behind her back - baggage from disappointments and dissatisfaction with life. If you do not pay attention to this, then happiness will never light up in the eyes of a divorced woman. Therefore, it is worth learning how to make yourself happy on your own.

As psychoanalysts testify, after a divorce, it is much more difficult for a woman to feel happy, unlike a man. She, even having initiated a divorce, experiences deep depression and a feeling of uselessness in the first months of her free life. In many cases, this feeling becomes a constant companion of a woman.

To become happy after a divorce, you must first realize that happiness has nothing to do with the presence of a man in your life. After all, he was married, and this did not bring you the long-awaited happiness. So, it's not about the stamp in the passport and men's shoes in the hallway. Happiness is the feeling that we need every day. Get yourself a notebook where you will write down all your dreams and desires. Only necessarily all - small and large, serious and ridiculous. Write down your dreams every day and do one thing every day. Do not make excuses for the lack of opportunities and strength, start your life anew and fill it with everything you would like. After a month of such work on your life, you will feel that happiness has become your constant companion, and your eyes are burning with an incredibly bright fire. And who knows, maybe this fire will attract new love into your life.

Loneliness: how not to turn into a strong woman?

So you are alone now. It doesn't matter what reasons led to it, but you are already inside the situation. How to live in harmony with yourself and not turn into that very strong woman who repels the male gender during the time of loneliness? How to stay attractive and happy? It's actually not hard at all:

always turn to men for help - you should not carry the heaviest bags, move furniture and repair cars, this will only reduce your feminine energy;
make men's housework done special people or male friends;
dress in dresses - they contribute to the accumulation of female energy and increase attractiveness in the eyes of the male;
take care of yourself - go to beauticians and stylists, in a cafe with girlfriends or allow yourself to go shopping;
communicate with other people - more often set aside time for visiting, cinema or theater;
learn to enjoy everyday things - in this case, happiness will always accompany you.

Surprisingly, psychologists have proven that a happy woman attracts the opposite sex like a magnet. And even if you do not plan to start a new romance, male attention always cheers you up. And that's part of happiness, isn't it?

Happiness is different: how to understand yourself?

You are successful, beautiful and feel great. But when you come to visit, you always feel the sidelong glances of your acquaintances and are embarrassed by questions about your unmarried status. Familiar situation, right? Many women, having achieved what they wanted in life, suddenly lose their sense of happiness and completely devalue themselves, rushing in search of a man. Stop. Stop and think - no one's opinion should be more important than your feelings and emotions. Therefore, if you like to live alone, and you enjoy this life, then perhaps you simply do not need a man. No, not at all needed, but at this time you can do just fine without it and go about your business. That is what brings you happiness.

By the way, there are a lot of women who are concerned about finding a husband under pressure from others. Psychologists even distinguish them into a special category, although for happiness they simply need to ignore someone else's opinion.

How to change your life and become a happy woman?

Do not be afraid of loneliness, it is an absolutely normal state for any person. After all, it cannot be assessed only from the negative side, it has a lot of pluses and positives. Therefore, learn to treat loneliness a little differently than is accepted in society, and you will be able to see all the benefits of this state:

enjoy freedom and the right to choose - after all, only you decide where to spend the evening and what curtains to buy in the living room;
show healthy selfishness - a single woman does not need to spend all her time on her family, she can allow herself to be pampered;
do not compare your life with the lives of other people - everyone has their good and bad times;
constantly expand your circle of acquaintances - communication with big amount new people sharpens eloquence and trains the mind.

And keep in mind that loneliness can be used to great advantage for yourself: spend your free time on self-development. It will be the wisest decision in life.

It's easy to give advice to single women. Relatives, parents and friends are happy to tell you how to become happy. All of them vying to praise their lives and impose certain stereotypes. From all this, even the most self-confident lady's head can go round. But how to become a happy woman if you are alone?

Just enjoy life!! Every new day, minute and hour, cultivate a sense of happiness in yourself. After all, it does not depend at all on relationships, wealth and social status. Aren't married women unhappy and lonely? And wealthy beauties? Do you really think that they always experience incredible happiness from their position? We think this is the clearest proof that happiness depends only on internal state person.

Look inside yourself and honestly ask what makes you happy. Now act. Right now, no delay. After all, this is your path to happiness.

1. Approval of others

What difference does it make what they think of you? If you are happy with the decisions you have made, then you have done right choice and it doesn't matter what others say. Imagine how much effort you spend trying to read other people's minds, and still do not guess.

Listen to advice - please, but do not let others decide how you live.

2. Anger and resentment

The next time you catch yourself feeling this way, think about this: “Would I like to be the person I envy?” Certainly not, you love yourself (even if somewhere very deep inside).

You are looking at someone else's life that you do not know. You have no idea what this person is thinking. Maybe when he dives into the pool of his private house, he hates himself or is wildly afraid of something? Maybe you, walking through the forest on a sunny day, experience much more pleasure than he does, basking on the snow-white sand in the Maldives?

Stop looking at others. If you feel good now, then everything is right. If not, make it good.

16. Uncertainty

Happy people tend to have self-esteem (just don't confuse it with an inflated ego). They are pleased with themselves and exude confidence.

There is no reason to doubt yourself. If you have traits that you hate, there are two ways: accept them or change them. In every person there is everything at once: a libertine, and a puritan, and a lying bastard, and a gentleman. You choose who you will be.

17. Dependence on others

No one will fill the void within you. No one will make you positive and self-sufficient if you are unhappy with your fate. To share your happiness with someone else, you must first become happy yourself. So do not even hope that your success is in the wrong hands. Only in yours.

18. Past

Living in the past means burying your present. There were mistakes - okay, who didn't? Arrange a magnificent funeral for your memories, remember only the lessons and.

19. Total control

Sometimes you just need to relax and let life take its course. You can't control everything and you have to deal with it. Otherwise, you will be constantly nervous, but in the end you still won’t change anything. There are just things that are out of your control. They must be accepted as they are.

20. Expectations

People think that others should live up to their expectations. That's bullshit. Nobody owes you anything, and you don't owe anything either. No one should be polite, attentive, accurate, honest, pleasant in communication, clean, after all. Nothing should be perfect, amazing, unforgettable, but it can be. If it does, great, if not, don't worry. Be ready to accept everything that life sends you, and you will find happiness.